Chasing a Dream

Since graduating from Linfield College in McMinnville, Oregon a few months ago I’ve done a lot of soul searching. I’ve worked some jobs that I have absolutely loved, and some that I absolutely loathed. One trait that I’ve always been proud of having is that of perseverance. I’ve been knocked down a lot and many times I could have just given up there. Life isn’t supposed to be easy, but I also don’t believe that you’re not supposed to put yourself through too much hell, either. I have persevered through some tough challenges, but I think my biggest hurdles are still ahead. In order to continue to follow the passion of writing, I will have to put myself through a little hell in order to come out successful, but I don’t mind that.

Currently, I am working at a job that I can easily be content with. I make a decent amount of money, I am in a leadership position and it is very close to where I reside, but it isn’t fulfilling. I’ve woken up every day not only dreading going into work, but also constantly trying to figure out what makes the job worthwhile, besides the paycheck. Not only does the job stress me out, but because of the stress and the hours, I don’t find the time to write like I should. And that’s just not going to fly anymore.

After graduation I moved from Oregon back to Vacaville, California. Vacaville is a hop and a skip away from both Sacramento and San Francisco, so there were many opportunities for work, but not for the kind of writing that I want to do. I went onto twitter one morning while bored and contacted numerous sketch and television writers about how I should kick start my career. There was a consensus on those that did reply to me and that was:

  1. Continue writing. Never stop writing.
  2. Move to Los Angeles or New York.

That stuck with me. The advice planted seeds deeply into my mind and into my gut. The seeds in my mind sprouted ideas and a curiosity that soon made the seeds in my gut erupt and burn. There were times where I’d lay awake at night and stare at my white ceiling. The muted colors from the television would dance on the darkened ceiling but I would just stare blankly.

“What if?” I’d sit and wonder. “What if I did move down there, would I be a success? Could I make something of myself?”

In July of this year, I decided to take that chance. I moved from the comfort of my home city and moved to Downey, California. I took that chance and moved and, for the moment, I thought that was enough. I got the job that I am in now and for that moment I was content. I was okay with the steps that I took. But, I sit here frustrated and stressed, because I didn’t come out here just to live, I came out here following a dream. I have years ahead of me to be content, but, today won’t be that day where I settle for anything less than what I have worked the majority of my life. I’m going to quit my job and work towards my career. I don’t mind betting on myself. In fact, I’ll take those odds any day of the week.

I don’t want to look back and wish that I hadn’t pursued something. I don’t want to look back and wish that I could have done more. I want to be able to look back and smile, and tell my story with pride.

Princess

He traveled through great plains in pursuit of his love.

He battled the natives and escaped bullets large and small.

He wrestled against evil Kappa’s and Kuribo,

And dove deep under water facing the minions of the deep.

He traversed through forests and utilized their plants to create fire.

He took the wings from birds and took to the sky.

With only his reptilian companion and younger brother, he fought against the Evil Dukes of more than 8 different countries.

He dismantled the enemy strongholds filled with masked apparitions.

He braved a frozen tundra, escaped hordes of insects, survived harsh deserts and passed through dangerous caves.

When he finally reached the captors castle he attacked fearlessly.

His battle with the King was brutal, but with an almost inhumane resolve, he felled the mighty king with three blows.

He went through it all for his,

Princess.

 

A story through the annals of time.

From birth he spied her.

They became best of friends.

She is kidnapped by the King of Demons and he must rescue her.

As one of the only links to her past, he braves a mysterious forest of thieves to retrieve the Sword of Legend.

With his trusty steed and Magnificent Sword in hand, he travels in years.

He defeats a giant volcanic serpent and the restless dead.

He cures a forest and a great lake from their demonic plight.

His journey leads him to face a myriad of atrocities and even defeat his tangible fear.

With his guide by his side he retrieves a powerful shield and takes to destroy the captors castle.

He mercilessly plows through the castles guards until he approaches the throne room where the Dark King resides.

The youth survives magic, trickery and the brutality of the King and fells him with a Sacred Arrow.

He did it all, with no regard to self, for his,

Princess.

 

History has recorded these men and others on perilous journeys.

Determination and drive set them apart from regular men.

When all was lost, they kept stride and moved with purpose.

Though we differ in certain aspects, these heroes and I share a similar trait.

This written journey was penned to show the steps that I’d make,

The risks that I’d take and the courage I’d lay,

All for my one and only,

Princess.

Fishing

I woke up this morning to a text message from my beloved wife,

“You are boring. I hate living just to make it to tomorrow. I’m leaving you.”

Unexpected? Yes.

Heart breaking to the point of crippling? Yes.

Amount of time crying? Ten minutes.

I can’t be late for work.

I start my morning regimen, sans wife, of course, by showering.

After my shower I go to grab some breakfast and realize my milk has spoiled; However, not in time though, a hefty spoonful of grape nuts slithers down my throat.

As I try my best not to puke my guts out, I begin to make coffee.

Turns out my wife took the coffee…

I step outside, dressed for the mediocrity of work I am about to experience. I dry my seemingly endless tear flowing face and get into my car.

My tank is empty.

I walk to the bus in my two-sizes-too-small loafers and begin to feel a pain in my heel. A blister is being born.

I make it to the bus and stand next to a drunk.

The bus ride goes smoothly.

Leaving the bus, though, not so smooth.

The drunk relieves his insides onto my child size loafers.

Instead of sending my hand down his throat to grasp the rest of his innards with my bare hands, I turn the other cheek and walk into work.

Being half an hour late I knew my boss would erupt, much like the drunk did.

He doesn’t though. He smiles, shows me to his office and gently expels me.

For life.

I walk to the bathroom to do more of my own expelling (tears), and finish in an astounding 8 minutes!

I leave what used to be my second home now and walk to a bar down the street, the ‘Endless Well.’

I spend more of the afternoon than I realize at the bottom of the Well and leave for my long trek home.

In leaving, I accidently bump into an older gentleman, who turns out to be quite grumpy, and am met egregiously with both his fists.

I pick myself up again from the bottom of the Well and stand outside, the breeze is cold on my fresh new wounds.

I walk to the bus bench and wait for the shuttle back to my empty, loveless house.

People walk past me and scowl. They whisper unmentionable things under their breath and they do their best not to make eye contact with me.

Life…

“Well, life is life right now, I guess.”

And when this thought crosses my mind I see a bag of money drop slowly from the sky.

My eyes light up, though I fear that I am going insane.

It floats, almost casually, down to the ground, and it plops a few yards away from me.

People look at it, as they walk by, but walk by nonetheless.

A man begins to reach for it, but stops, and continues walking.

I get up. Look around. And pick it up.

Yep.

Real money.

I close the bag up, ecstatic that my luck has changed, and begin to walk towards a brighter tomorrow with a smile on my face.

After a few steps I feel a huge jerk and then a stab in my ribs.

I look down and see a huge hook bulging from me.

My jaw drops and my sight momentarily fails as shock sets in.

The next tug sends me sprawling into the air.

People stare at me in disbelief and scramble away.

I scream, or try to, as I fly higher and higher into the sky.

I pass through the stratosphere and on into the dark abyss that is space.

The incredible speed that I move boggles every cell in my body.

As I begin to pass out I hear a plop, splash and see a magnificent light I’ve never experienced before.

A booming voice shouts in excitement,

“BOOOOOY, I’ve got another!

The magnificent Being pulls me in closer and I can feel an overpowering aura from it.

“This one looks a little beat up! But hey, a catch is a catch.”

The Being extracts the metallic hook from my body carefully and places me into a freezing vat.

I gasp for air, bouncing sporadically, dying slowly.

Freezing.

What a day.